Lean On Me

I remember watching Stand & Deliver and Lean On Me as a kid and being completely inspired. Something about the "inspirational teacher role" in Hollywood truly makes them bigger than life. Edward James Olmos injecting "ganas" (desire) into his students, Morgan Freeman confronting the drug addictions of his students and pushing them to change their lives; both examples challenge us to take a bigger bite out of life.  We learn about great war heroes in history books, watch dazzling sports heroes on tv and listen to captivating music on our iPods, but to find a teacher with the right combination of passion, knowledge and skill may easily become a greater personal hero to a student than an over-paid basketball player taking off from the free-throw line or an over-celebrated baseball player hitting one outside the park.

 

Yesterday I started my third quarter at CSUEB in Hayward, and I must say that I'm really looking forward to the research and readings I'll be studying. The past two quarters were easy enough for me to transition from a two-year junior college to a four-year state university, but this quarter deems to be a little more challenging; I'll be taking social control, sociology of the family, and re-taking my statistics class, each requiring their own amount of attention and focus while working part-time and assuming a position on student government.

"You can approach this course one of two ways," began one of my instructors. "You can approach it in a way that is purely academic, in which you do the required readings and I give your earned grade, or you can approach this course as a transformational experience, in which you learn more about yourself and gain some skills necessary to apply to your 'happy' job once you graduate and leave this school. I opt for the latter."

I smiled. Teachers like this inspire me to work a little harder, dig a little deeper and reach a little farther. I'm starting the quarter with optimism, and taking my professor up on his offer. There truly is a difference between being informed and transformed. I'm opting for the latter.

Giving Me The Eye

  

"The lamp of the body is the eye; if therefore your eye is good, your whole body will be full of light. If therefore your eye is bad, your whole body will be full of darkness."Matt 6:22-23 (NKJV)

This was the first scripture I memorized when I was new to my faith. I remember being very skeptical about the bible at the time, questioning everything it said. After nine years of trying to decipher the text, I just gave up. 

Shortly after that, I attended a real estate seminar in which the speaker made $100,000 in ten months:

"You have to run this business like you are on a mission. You have to run your life like you were on a mission, and you can't be afraid of offending people. Anyone who did anything great always had enemies: Gandhi had enemies, Martin Luther King had enemies, JFK had enemies. Jesus Christ was on a mission, and He offended a lot of people, and He was perfect."

My jaw dropped. I could not believe what I had just heard. There I was, having given up on the bible, growing up catholic but absent from church for the past three years, not wanting to belong to any type of "organized religion," having doubts about Christianity, and I hear this. There I was trying to learn how to get rich quick, and instead I hear the gospel of Jesus Christ. I don't remember anything else from that seminar, but I do remember that I went home that day, found my bible, dusted it off, and gave it one for shot (note: I did not use that message as an excuse to begin offending people left and right; I used it to begin reading the bible again!).

That was the beginning of my first year walking with the Lord.

I went home that day asking two questions:

1. Who was Jesus, and

2. What was His mission?

Before, I would read the bible just to "figure it out," to unlock the code, and somehow decipher it. This time, I read the bible seeking to know Jesus.

Growing up catholic, my family and I went to church every Sunday, and as far as recall, we never really missed. We were literally there religiously. I went to catholic elementary school and catholic high school, but after all those years I still did not know the answer to those simple questions (please note: this is not to demean my catholic upbringing in any way; I still attend catholic church at times and will be attending a catholic charismatic retreat this summer).  This time, I was determined to find out.

In reading the bible, I used to just flip through any random part and begin reading. Needless to say, I don't remember understanding a lot of it. This time however, I started in the New Testament with what Jesus said, with only the red words:

"The lamp of the body is the eye; if therefore your eye is good, your whole body will be full of light. If therefore your eye is bad, your whole body will be full of darkness."

"That makes sense," I thought to myself. Each time I interact with people while looking them in the eye, nine times out of ten I get a pleasant encounter. Whenever I avoided eye contact with people, it was usually because I was ashamed, embarrassed or depressed.

"The lamp of the body is the eye..." This is true! I immediately underlined it in my bible; it was the first scripture I highlighted, and was the first scripture I memorized. "What else did Jesus teach?" I read some more. And some more. And some more. I read until I read everything Jesus said. A lot of the things I did not understand, but the things I did understand made complete sense to me. Later on that year, I began meeting more Christians and attending different churches until I found my church home in December 2005. 

When I found the Lord that year, obviously people everywhere noticed. I just wasn't the same; I was excited all the time, hopeful, and extra-engaging. One particular friend of mine took notice and was flabbergasted. She and I were on a similar agnostic path before this all happened and was just stunned. I told her that I was doubtful at first too, but when I read Matthew 6:22 it just made sense!

"Interesting," she said. "I''l have to try that." The following day I get a text from her saying, "It works!" Apparently, while taking BART to work she made eye contact with several different people. Immediately, the natural reaction was to give a faint smile of acknowledgment. She went to Starbucks that day and made eye contact with the barista, when normally she would just look at the menu and order. This time she looked her in the eye, smiled, and felt good inside (I have not heard back from her since this conversation, but hopefully she has continued the effort).

I decided to share this story because today something similar happened to a friend of mine. "I know something is changing in me," he began, "because I'm beginning to do something different; I'm starting to look people in the eye now." 

It may seem like an insignificant gesture to many people, but to some, the simple act of making eye contact is as difficult as pulling teeth. I told my friend this story today, and I am sharing it with you because I believe that doing something as simple as making eye contact in one's daily life could be the first step in fulfilling one's destiny. 

Go ahead. Make eye contact today. If your eye is good, your whole body will be full of light. If your eye is bad, your whole body will be full of darkness. I want to be full of light; life's too grand to waste it in the dark.

The Global Positioning System

 

     

A few days ago, a friend and I had lunch together. Catching up as friends do, he asked what I've been up to. For the sake of the post, I will call him "Jake."

Jake: So, what have you been up to lately?

Me: Oh, going to school, going to work.

Jake: Oh, what are you studying?

Me: Sociology.

Jake: Nice. So what are you gonna do after that? Be a counselor?

Me: Actually, I want to start a school. I've been wanting to reform education ever since I was in third grade. I asked the school counselor if I need to get my BA in Education. He said I didn't, and recommended I take sociology. 

Jake: Wow man, that's pretty inspiring! You'll be like Tony Robbins speaking in front of thousands of people with a little "Janet Jackson mic!" 

Me: LOL! Yeah, that's what I imagined. This all started last February when I was asked, "where do you see yourself in 10 years?" After meditating on it for about a month, I realized that I wanted to head toward the direction of education reform; the end goal is to reform education, however lofty and idealistic it may be. John F, Kennedy said, referring to his presidential ideals, "All this will not be finished in the first 100 days. Nor will it be finished in the first 1,000 days, nor in the life of this administration, nor even perhaps in our lifetime on this planet. But let us begin." 

I see the goal-setting aspect of life like a GPS; before I start my car, I enter in my destination. Do I want to go San Francisco? Oakland? LA? Vegas? New York? I decide. In Lewis Carrol's Alice in Wonderland, Alice asked the Cheshire Cat which road she should take. The cat responded, "where do you want to go?" In which Alice replied, "I don't know. It really doesn't matter." Says the cat, "If you don't know where you want to go, then any road will get you there." 

The GPS is a wonderful invention. I honestly don't know how I'd get around without it, and how I ever did get around before I had it. It's amazing;  I can go wherever I want in the country as long as I have a specific address and satellite reception. Not only will I know where to go, but the GPS also tells me how long it will take for me to get there, and the distance it is from where I am to where my destination is. What's even more fascinating is that even when I make a wrong turn, even when I go left when it says, "go right," the GPS doesn't make me feel stupid or condemn me; it simply says, "recaluclating." Given, it  will take me longer to get to my destination, but it doesn't mean that I will never get there. 

I think a lot of us beat ourselves up because we made some mistakes in life, or we made a few wrong turns (or for some, several wrong turns.). Rest assured there is a purpose and plan for you life, and the GPS is already set; for some the reception just needs to reach the satellite. If you are reading this and feel like you are Alice conversing with the Cheshire Cat, send me a message and we can chat. I don't know the specifics of exactly what your destiny entails, but I may be able encourage you in some way.

Jake: Check out what my fortune cookie says...

Me: (reading) "Failing to plan is planning to fail."

With one year down and nine to go, I'm excited for what the future has in store. The future is coming whether you live your dreams or not, so I invite you to live it with me!

10 Items or Less

     I've been working for a popular retail company for six months now, and I've been enjoying it. It's definitely a job that requires a lot of time and task-orientation, which is part of why I chose to work there. I have been learning a lot about customer service, time-management, and conflict-resolution, as well as improving my people-skills on a day-to-day basis.

     I have also learned something new about communication. There are so many different ways to communicate a message. For example when I open up the "10 Items or Less" checklane, I say in a loud voice "10 Items of Less! I can help the next guest!" A lot of times, the customers do not hear me. I speak louder: "I can help the next guest over here!" Still nothing. By now, I have to move out of my lane and physically approach the guests (at our store we refer to our customers as "guests," for a more inviting atmosphere.) and individually tell them that I'm open.

     This experience has taught me the following:

     1. Raising your voice does not necessarily mean that you're improving your communication;
     sometimes you're just raising your voice. It doesn't matter how loud you speak, how bright your 
     colors are, or how great your product is. If your guest cannot hear you, you'll just be in your lane
     by yourself.

     2. If the person you want to communicate with does not or cannot hear you, you may need to
     change your strategy, stop what you're doing and do something different. In my case, I had to
     stop shouting and start approaching.

     3. When you change your strategy, sometimes you need to change your tone. When I began ap-
     proaching each guest, I no longer had to shout. Sometimes I can just gently say, "I'm open over  
     here," and other times all I need to do is make eye contact, wave, and smile. No shouting. No
     hooping, no hollering.  

     It is amazing how one simple experience of opening up a "10 Items of Less" lane can teach me so much about communication. I'm looking forward to applying what I learned at the checklane to my other areas in life.

       

The Sandlot

   In the movie The Sandlot, Benjamin Franklin Rodriguez was the cool kid on the block. Suave, smooth, and debonair, the girls liked him and the guys wanted to be like him. He was cool and charming, but most of all he was great at baseball. 

     Scotty Smalls was the awkward kid in town. Skinny, scrawny, and socially inept, Scotty wanted nothing more than to fit in. His clothes didn't fit and he wasn't up to date with pop culture. He didn't fit in with the rest of the kids, but he wanted to. Not only that, but he really really wanted to play baseball. The only problem was he wasn't very good. He wasn't good at all.

     Benny Rodriguez saw past the awkwardness of Scotty Smalls and gave him a chance. He picked him to be part of the team and guided him very calmly in the sport, assuring him to "just stick out your hand," and "I'll hit it toward you." Sure enough, Benny's home run went straight toward Smalls (straight to his face, but straight toward him nonetheless).

Richmond is a dangerous city to grow up in as a child. I didn't have any friends growing up because it was too dangerous to play outside. My parents didn't play sports so I didn't have anyone to play catch with, and I never knew how to play baseball, basketball, or football. By the time I was in elementary school I was the "Scotty Smalls" in the corner during recess and lunch, not being picked to be on anyone's team because I didn't even know how to play!

     One day, everything changed. Ray Vargas was the "Benny Rodriguez" on campus. He was the popular kid in school, so if you were cool with Ray, you were cool with everybody. Ray would see me on the corner during recess day after day. One particular day he decided to pick me on his team! I couldn't believe it. As the years went on I learned basketball, I joined the team, and eventually became one of the popular kids along-side Ray! My self-esteem got stronger and stronger, until eventually I felt confident enough to run for class president in the 8th grade (which led to Sophomore Class Representative in high school and Junior Class President). As my friendship with Ray developed he even became my campaign manager that year and I ultimately was elected Student Body President of my elementary school. 

   In this age of social media and cyber-bullying, we need more kids like Ray Vargas and Benny Rodriguez. The way a child is treated as a youth plays a huge role in molding their self-esteem. Instead of plastering people all over Twitter and Facebook we should build people up. One small act could change a child's life forever. I know, because I was once a "Scotty Smalls."

MJ At 50

Earlier this month, Michael Jordan turned 50. It's hard to imagine an athlete so known for his youthful talent grow old; we wish people like him can live forever in their prime. Thanks, MJ, for giving the world such inspiration. You're truly the greatest of all time.

Moon-Letters

"Moon-letters are rune-letters, but you cannot see them," said Elrond, "not when you look straight at them. They can only be seen when the moon shines behind them, and what is more, with the more cunning sort it must be a moon of the same shape and season as the day when they were written. They are runes but can only be read in the moonlight."

J.R.R Tolkien in his best-selling classic The Hobbit illustrates a scene where Gandalf and Bilbo Baggins approach the elves for help in reading an ancient scroll.    

Such is with the Word of God. I remembered for nine years reading the bible, trying to decipher the text, all to no avail. I would go to bible studies, read it on my own, ask different people, but in the end I would be more confused than when I started; I would find more hypocrisy than truth; more riddles than clarity. Not soon after, I just gave up trying to figure out the bible altogether, and dismiss it merely as a book of nice stories, but nothing much different than Bulfinch's Mythology or Aesop's Fables.

After nine years I realized that the reason why I could not understand the bible was because I was going about it all wrong. I was trying to decipher it, to "figure it out." It was all heady stuff, purely intellectual. I realized that in order to truly understand the bible, I would need to read it in the same spirit in which it was written. The bible is no ordinary book. Yes it was written by man, inspired by God, but it was written as a means of communicating to God's people, as a means of giving us hope, purpose, instruction, and clarity.

Color Vibe

 

Today I just finished my first 5k run at Discovery Kingdom in Vallejo! I was a bit anxious at first because it has been a couple years since the last time I ran for exercise. 17 days of P90X definitely prepared me well for this run. I walked a lot of it, but just the act of me being out there already made me feel well accomplished. Needless to say, I can't wait for the next one!

Using Everything You Got

 

Today in statistics class I sat in the first seat of the middle row, 10 mins early, charged my laptop, ready with notebook, calculator, multi colored pens, and recorder. All these tools, and I used ALL of them. In fact, missing one would cause ineffectiveness.

Sometimes we got to use everything in our disposal, consistently, at the proper time to use them.

Big Rocks

   In his book The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, the late Steven Covey illustrates the third habit, put first things first, using the analogy of filling a jar with rocks. In order to completely fill the jar, one must start with the big rocks first. Next comes the smaller rocks. After that, one must fill the jar with sand. Once the sand reaches the top, one must fill the jar with water. Then and only then will the jar be completely filled. What is important to note is the order in which this is done. The jar cannot be filled by starting with water, then sand, then small rocks, then big rocks; eventually the big rocks will not be able to fit at all. The question Mr. Covey poses his readers is, "What are the 'big rocks' in your life?"

One of the great lessons I learned in 2012 is to plan everything as far in advance as possible. I learned to be more "gold" (see my blog post entitled, Ten Things I Learned in 2012). In being more "gold," I am being more time and task-oriented, more strategic, more detailed, and more prepared. Here are the six "big rocks" in my life:


                                                               1. FAITH
                                                               2. FITNESS
                                                               3. FAMILY
                                                              4. FRIENDS
                                                              5. FINANCES
                                                              6. FUN

1. FAITH. Faith is my biggest rock, and I urge it to be everyone's biggest rock as well. The whole purpose of life is to be in relationship with God. Everything else is meaningless (the entire book of Ecclesiastes talks about this.)  Hebrews chapter 11 is filled with examples of people God used for His purpose and glory because of their faith. In fact, "Without faith it is impossible to please God." (Hebrews 11:6). He alone is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will never be shaken. (Psalm 62:2).


2. FITNESS. Fitness is my second biggest rock. Steve Jobs literally had more money than the US government, but even with all that money he could not buy back his health. What good is money if you don't have the health to enjoy it? Now that I am in my thirties, I see more of the value of taking care of my body. In my twenties, I used to go to gym to get buff; now I just go to the gym to not die! Someone once asked me, "how often does an average person change cars?" I answered, "maybe once every five years," He then asked, "If you were only given one car for your entire life, how differently would you treat it?" "Very differently," I replied. "The same is with your body; you're only given one. How do you treat it now, and how differently would you treat it, with the new revelation that this is the only one you have for the rest of your life?" Needless to say, it was a good wake-up call for me.

3. FAMILY. Family is my third rock. Originally I considered "finances" as my third, but I realized that friends are more valuable than money, and family is more valuable than friends. You can choose your friends, but you can't choose your family. Last year I had a huge revelation of the value of "honoring your parents." Last year I made the decision to go back to school to honor God, to honor myself, to honor my family, and to honor posterity. Last year I was so excited to go back to school. Now, as 2013 is beginning and with my first quarter completed, I am even more excited to return and strike out again. There is saying that says, "blood is thicker than water." Family is so important because it provides a sense of support, safety, security, and success (in terms of succeeding a family name).  

4. FRIENDS. "How many of us have them?" So goes the verse by 80's rap group Whodini. The motto of personal finance guru Suze Orman is: "People first, then money, then things." This is true. I take it a step further and say, "God first, then people, then money." Comedian Dave Chappelle was recently interviewed by James Lipton on Inside The Actor's Studio and said these words:

"Hollywood is a very powerful illusion…. What about my family? What about my friends?            Whatever happened to my friends? I don’t even have any friends! People don’t understand it, so they call me crazy, and I don’t like that... I like people, I like entertaining, but it seems the higher up I go, the less happy I am... I want to live a more open life… but that’s what happens when you become successful. Your humanity diminishes, and you become something else to people."

Money is very important, but not as important as friends. In fact with the right friends and the right business idea you can actually make money.

5. FINANCES. Finances are extremely important. The late Zig Ziglar said, "Money isn't the most important thing in the world, but it rates up there with oxygen. In fact, people who say 'I'm not interested in money' probably lie about other things too." Business expert Robert Kiyosaki says, "Money isn't the most important thing in the world, but it affects every that is important." This is very true. People with more money can give more to charity, have access to better fitness, better education, afford better food, and have less limitations than people without. Given, it does not replace one's faith, fitness, family or friends, but it does affect all those areas. Last year, I was challenged to live by the 15/15/70 rule, which is to give 15% to God, save 15%  myself, and live off the remaining 70%. I was very hesitant at first and very challenged. In fact, I was so challenged that I only followed it a few months out of the year. The fact that I am not much in a different financial situation this year than last is due to my failure in obeying the path laid out before me.  What I am striving for in 2013 and for the rest of my life is excellence in stewarding my finances, so that I may increase my manner of means in all those areas, including my sixth big rock, which is "Fun." 

6. FUN. The last on my priority list is fun. It is good to have fun, but not at the expense of the previous five. Even if I don't get to this last priority, it wouldn't break me. This would be the equivalent of pouring the water inside the proverbial jar; my big rocks are in, my small rocks are in, the sand is in, and all that's left is the water, the icing on the cake. Even without the water, the jar is very full, and very effectively positioned. Fun is good, and everyone has their own idea of what is fun to them. Because I think big, my idea of fun would involve all five of my "rocks." With my family and friends I would live to:

Watch the sunset over Maccu Piccu. Spend a summer at a villa in Tuscany. Deep sea dive off the coast of Australia's Great Coral Reef. See the Northern Lights in Sweden...

Life has so many things to offer. If you have lost inspiration for things to do and places to go in life, I'm sure that pinterest.com would quickly inspire you to do more things and go more places. For a lot of us, however, the challenge lies in two areas: time and money. When we are young many of us have all the time in the world, but no money to enjoy our time. When we get older some of us have more money but less time. The sad thing is that many of us are older and still have no money and no time. True freedom is when we have time and money together. One could be free in the spirit, but slaves financially. I believe we are truly not free until we are free in all areas. The good thing is (and the Good News is) that as we put the Big Rock of FAITH in our jar first, it will pave the way for abundance in all the other areas. Jesus said "Seek first My Kingdom and My righteousness and all this will be added to you (Matt 6:33)." This is not to say that worshiping Jesus will instantly guarantee you worldly riches; far from it. The wealth of the gospel is not to be confused with the gospel of wealth. It is simply saying that God knows our needs, and as we keep Him as our Big Rock, we suddenly find ourselves in a state of "not wanting," in a state of faith knowing  "He supplies all my needs according to His riches in glory (Phil 4:19)."

Having said all this, I am ecstatic over 2013, because I know what my Big Rocks are, and I am already putting them in place. May we all identify what's necessary in our proverbial jar, and fill up 2013 to its fullest!



The New Year Transition

 

 

January and December are two of my favorite months of the year. One symbolizes ending a chapter, and the other symbolizes beginning a new one. Five days have passed in the new year and I have already replaced old habits with new ones, bad habits with good ones. At the end of 2011 I remember being so excited for 2012. Now that it is 2013, I am even MORE excited for this year, namely because I am a year wiser, smarter, and more resilient to accomplish what I set out for in my life. I am beginning the new year with "The Top Ten Things I Learned in 2012" as my premise, and I am so excited. Here's to a new year, with new beginnings, and new habits!

 

Stars

 

When we look at the night sky, we are looking at light that the stars began sending us millions of years ago. In fact, by the time we see the starlight, the star that radiated it might not even exist anymore. We are looking deeply into space, but we are seeing backward into time. The greater the distance of a star from an observer on earth, the longer it takes the star's light to reach the observer.

Such is the wisdom of history, the biographies of leaders and revolutionaries, builders and titans, artist and entertainers, scientist and poets. Many of these heroes lived many years ago, yet their light is only reaching us now. Technology advances at a neck-breaking speed in this day and age. I can only imagine how incredible our world would be if our wisdom advances together with our technology.

Supremely Qualified

 

A few months ago I was asked, "What are you supremely qualified to teach?" The question is still lingering in my mind, and I still don't have an answer. I know what I'm good at, but I wouldn't say I'm so good that I'm "supremely qualified to teach" it.

Malcolm Gladwell equated "mastery" with devoting a certain amount of focused hours to a task. Looking back, I'm wondering what is it that I could have said that I have done consistently for the past 10 years?

Journaling.

Shawshank Redemption is my favorite movie. Pressure and time. A little bit each night. After that movie I asked myself, "what is it that I could do 'a little bit each night' that will allow me to escape my own personal prison?"

I used to put "X" marks on my calendars after each day, but after a month was completed, what did I have? A whole month of "X's!" Why was I even alive that day if all I did was replace it with an "X?" 10 years ago I decided to replace an "X" with words and I now have a decade of life experiences, conserved through words, on 10 monthly calendars.

At this point, the only thing I can think of that I am supremely qualified to teach are my life experiences, the things that have happened to me, and the things I have made happen.

I would like to one day be supremely qualified to teach about pastorpreneurship: leadership through pastoring and business development. I think that "one day" is coming very very fast.